Outtakes and B-Sides

I was looking through some old versions of Destroy All Cars in preparation for the Sister Spit tour, and I found some funny bits that did not make it to the final version.


THE FIASCO OF AUTOMOTIVE TRANSPORT

At my high school, when school lets out, many students have to cross Hillsdale Blvd. to go home. THERE ARE SO MANY CARS ON THIS ROAD, THE STUDENTS CANNOT GET ACROSS. They have to walk all the way to the light on 72nd street. There, they push the WALK button, and stand and wait. First all the left turn cars go. Then all the right turn cars go. Then all the straight ahead cars go. The students observe this endless flow of cars as they stand pathetically on the side of the road with their rain-soaked backpacks and their dripping rain-ponchos. They see the people in the cars, talking on their cell phones, drinking their Big Gulps, but do those people see them? Of course not. Why should they? People without vehicles are second class citizens. People standing on the side of the road are of no consequence. People who walk are laughable. ALL SERIOUS PEOPLE ARE OPERATING VEHICLES. Thus by the process of humiliation, we teach our young people that they must join into the fiasco that is automotive transport or be cast aside onto the pedestrian crosswalks of life.